Tuesday, 19 January 2016

Top 10 Disadvantages of Falling in Love

First of all, let me point something out; I am not a misogynist. And I don't hate love. In fact, I love love. I love love so much that I would have been writing a romance novel every week if not that I have to worry about bad sentences and editing. Love is a beautiful thing, and one of the most wonderful feelings in the world. But just like every emotion in the world, it has its opposite. This is not a perfect world. For the world to even approach perfection, we have to be flawed, cos the universe has to be dual for it to exist at all.

Let me stop. I am going into the esoteric mombo jombo region. Back to the lecture at hand. Before I go on, I would love to say that this article is talking about love between a man and a woman, not the type of unconditional love that is between say me and my little 2 year old niece, Toni. Not the type of love between mother and child, or between siblings, but that electric feeling people get when they fall in love with each other. As it has lots of advantages, it also has a bunch of disadvantages too. I have taken time to list ten disadvantages of falling in love below.

10. Possibility of Having Your Heart Broken 
Yep, as sweet as love is, there is always that possibility that you might get your heart broken. Think about it, what's the percentage of people that marry the first person they fell in love with as a teenager? Very low. What that means is that, an average adult would have gotten his/her heart broken at least 3-4 times before he or she finally finds the love of his/her life. If you have ever been heartbroken, I don't have to tell you how bad the feeling is.

9.  Loss of Freedom
Men! This is one disadvantage that kept me from getting into a relationship for a while. I make spontaneous decisions some times, and if you are like me, you might make up your mind to go somewhere or do something that has the potential of changing your life, but when you are in a relationship, you have to think of your significant other and how your moves would affect them. That can sometimes be a pen in the a$$ for an ambitious person.

8.  Drama
Oh yea, there is always the drama. Of cos that comes after the initial electrifying episode of love. I once had this girlfriend when I went to the East to serve. Almost every morning, she would come over to the room I shared with my friend and watch me sleep till I opened my eyes. We later decided to move into a two bedroom apartment together. The first few weeks were perfect, then came the drama. In the end, I had to move out for a while when things were starting to get ugly. Yup! There will always be some form of drama.

7.  Giving Chance For its Polar Opposite- Hate
I am sure you have heard of the saying, 'there is a thin line between love and hate.' In fact there is a movie with that title staring Martin Lawrence. I remember watching that on social night back when I was in secondary school. Yea, there is really a thin line between love and hate. I am sure you know a few people that once loved each other but now hate each other so much. Some people even kill people they once loved so dearly. Love and hate are polar opposites, and it is not shocking to see one or two parties involved in a previous relationship slip to the other end of the spectrum when love dies out between them.

6.  Limitation
This is similar to number 9. Love limits what you can do cos all your focus is on loving that one person.

5.  Loss of Ambition
When you hear people that are madly in love talk, you hear them say stuff like, "you are my world," "nothing else matters to me but you," and stuff like that. Think about all the sacrifices that goes into building a business empire, or becoming a great musician, or writer, and tell me someone in love can really be ambitious. Did Michael Jackson have a great love life during his climb to the top? Does Aliko Dangote look like a hopeless romantic to you? In fact, the man has been married and divorced a total of three times. Something always has to give for you to be that great.

4.  Cutting Off Friends and Family
I had one very close friend (he is still my close friend) most part of my teenage years, and I learnt first hand, one of the disadvantages of love. Once he got into the university, my friend met this lovely petite girl, and he fell so deep in-love, down the rabbit hole that he cut off every one of his friends. It was really shocking to me at the time, and it made me realize how powerful love can actually be. I am sure you have heard of men cutting off all their family and friends just because of the love of a woman. I am not saying it is bad to give more of your time to your lover than anyone else, but I think it is unhealthy to cut-off everyone you knew prior to meeting the person in question.

3.  Vulnerability 
Many girls become so vulnerable while in love. I remember watching this old Chinese movie where this girl with a long ponytail was beating up everybody. Then she fell in love with this skinny dude, and the guy would push her around and she would start crying, even though she could break the guy's jaw with one blow.

You also have the hundreds or thousands of people who fall for online scams because they have been blinded by love. Love makes even the toughest, strictest person vulnerable.

2.  Possibility of Being Depressed and Suicidal at the End of It
 Oh my! This is one very bad part of falling in love...the end. Most people go into depression after love ends, and some even vow never to love again. Some become suicidal and just want to take their own life.

1.  Falling in Love is Expensive 
Yup! Falling in love is damn too expensive. I am not saying you spend more money while in love, no, the opposite can even be the case. What I mean is that when you are in love, all the opportunities you forgo makes love expensive...cos it is costing you a lot to be and stay in love.

Yup! That's it folks. With all I have listed, I still love the feeling of love, and must especially, the feeling of falling in love. As the popular saying goes, 'it is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all.'

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